An interesting report on the radio this week got me thinking. I may not have it exactly right, but this is what I understood: Researchers compared attitudes toward learning in the U.S. with attitudes in Japan. In the U.S., according to this study, children are praised for catching on quickly, and such kids are called smart. In Japan, children are praised for working hard, and I heard no mention of intelligence. Researchers visited a classroom in both places and gave the children a math problem that was impossible to solve. The American children gave up in under a minute; the Japanese kids struggled for an hour until the researchers told them to stop. The report concluded that each society yielded different weaknesses. Japanese children tolerate prolonged effort well but aren’t very creative, and vice versa. And I thought that we writers are the perfect combo of East and West. We need that creative spark, but it comes to nothing without a lot, A LOT, of hard grunt work, which we may not honor enough. After all, I felt embarrassed when the last novel, whatever its name will be, took so long. I thought it should have come more easily, but now I’m taking comfort. Writers have it all!
Now onto this week’s topic. On September 1, 2012, Leslie Marie, aka Kilmeny-of-the-Ozarks, wrote, I have a writing question. It’s about the use of hyperbole. I was reading an excellent article on the subject this morning and it reminded me of an instance where my writing instructor said I had used hyperbole and should delete it.
The problem is, my story is Christian fantasy based on Norse myth–and the hyperbole was the World Ash Tree that, according to myth, the world is built upon. I described the trunk of a tree as “larger than a mountain.” I didn’t think it hyperbole but logical for my imagined world–if it’s holding up the whole world then surely it would be bigger than the mountains! She said it’s too big a stretch of the imagination.
My instructor has been very helpful, so I want to listen and learn, but this seems like a necessary “hyperbole” for my story! The article I mentioned, used Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Barsoom series (e-texts can be found on Project Gutenberg–fun read!) for an example–that hyperbole doesn’t work well when everything is stretched to the limit. Like all the women are gorgeous, all the bad guys are the cruelest he’s ever met, the hero has no faults…but it seemed to me that I had enough contrasts in my story for the huge tree to stand out…
So, I guess what I’m asking is, what do you think of hyperbole? How can it be done well and when should it be avoided?
First off, the comparison between a tree that supports a world and a mountain doesn’t seem like hyperbole to me, just a reasonable comparison that gives the reader a sense of scale, a way to judge size.
But I do agree with the article about hyperbole overload. When everyone and every feature of landscape are maxed out, that sense of scale is erased. It doesn’t sound like you did that.
Generally, I like hyperbole because hyperbolic language is lively and economical. Here’s an example from my Dave at Night in which Dave describes Mr. Bloom, the superintendent of the orphanage where he’s just been left. Mr. Bloom is the main villain of the book.
Mr. Bloom was huge, not fat. His chest and head loomed over his desk like the Hebrew Home for Boys loomed over Broadway. He pushed back his chair and stood up. Scraping against the wall on the way, he walked around to my side of his desk and bent down to inspect me through thick spectacles. He smiled, showing a million teeth.
I guess there are two examples of hyperbole here, the comparison between Mr. Bloom looming and the orphanage dominating the street, and the million teeth. The reader knows he doesn’t have that many, but she gets the picture: big, fake smile showing lots of teeth, which I could have said straight out, something like this, Mr. Doom’s big smile, which revealed a lot of teeth, seemed fake. See? It’s not as lively, and it uses up more words; it’s not economical.
Besides, hyperbole gives an opportunity for character development. Imagine Phil is describing Zelda, a very short person (like me). Will he say she’s small as a Barbie doll or a hamster or a dot of dust in sunlight? The answer suggests the cast of Phil’s mind by the kind of similes he’s drawn to.
We can also use hyperbole to reveal a character’s emotional state. In the grip of terror, a character can see a threat unrealistically, hyperbolically. The gun in the mugger’s hand can seem to glow; the mugger himself can appear seven feet tall. In the grips of romance, Phil can describe Zelda to his friend Petra as having emerald eyes, skin as perfect as satin, and the delicacy of a butterfly. Petra, who’s maybe a wee bit jealous, meets Zelda and comes up with her own hyperboles when she thinks, Yeah, right. Eyes the exact color of pus, the kind of thin skin that makes you look eighty by the time you’re thirty, and skinny as a pencil.
The barbie-hamster-dust simile, whichever is chosen, when delivered by an impartial narrator, gives a sense of Zelda. A hamster creates quite a different picture in a reader’s imagination than Barbie does. And dust in sunlight is fascinating. Is Zelda dirty? Fragile? Both? We can’t wait to learn more about her.
Hyperbole is characteristic of tall tales and part of their charm. For example, the fish that got away was as big as a whale. When we use wild hyperbole we employ a technique of tall tales that adds flavor to our story. I say, go for it.
Here are three prompts:
∙ Write a tall tale about one of your friends or someone in your family. Pick one of her most important qualities and exaggerate it and its effects. For example, my father was pretty charming, so in my tale I might have him charm the painted bird off a plate and go on from there.
∙ Pick a character in one of your stories and describe him hyperbolically. Go way over the top. Consider the result and, if any of it fits, insert that part of the description in your story.
∙ Fairy tales, which deal in exaggeration, are perfect for hyperbole. Retell a fairy tale loading up on the hyperbole. Don’t worry about overdoing. If it gets funny, so much the better.
Have fun, and save what you write!
Hannah says:
Overdoing the characters personalities as a writing exercise sounds so fun! Those facts about the difference in Japanese and American children were fascinating! It's certainly hard when establishing a culture to create those differences.
I admire you for taking the time to respond to the letters that people send you. To be honest, as a writer it's hard to see how you can make time for such glorious blog posts! Thank you for sharing such words of wisdom for us to read.
I'm not sure how we're supposed to write to you when we have a question… so I'll just say it here. My brother and I are both writing fantasy books set in the time of castles and knights. But there is something we can't seem to get the hang of, how do you introduce a friend to your character without making the reader think that they're going to fall in love?
Here is my example, my brother has a character who is on his way to the castle to become one of the kings messengers, but along the way he meets a girl, who agrees to guide him there. The girl becomes his friend, but when I read it I thought maybe they liked each other. That really offended my brother, so we thought we'd ask if you had any advice about this.
I looked through many of your posts here, if you've already covered something similar I must apologize.
-Hannah B.
gailcarsonlevine says:
I wrote this in a post about writing romance: "It is a truth universally acknowledged, that we the readers upon encountering two single characters will speculate about, and most likely wish for, romance between them." It's not your fault for what you thought! Your brother will have to work to defeat this expectation. He can have one or both of them already be in a relationship, although that may not completely do it. Or one of them can be unappealing to the other. Other people may have more ideas. This is definitely the place for questions.
writeforfun says:
I can't think of what book it was, but I read one book where the writer actually said, "He didn't really LOVE her, but he loved being with her," right there in the book, just to clarify to the reader that they were NOT in love. I also can think of another book that described a girl as being a boy's "Best friend and a sister all rolled up in one." Comparing her to a sister immediately kept me from thinking "love interest." That's not to say that that's the best way of doing it, just what I've seen.
E.S. Ivy says:
The brother/sister description was what came to mind for me too! I think that unless you give one of them other love interests, readers are going to always speculate. But eventually when your character has no romantic thoughts that ever revealed *most* readers will catch on. But not all. Remember Harry/Ron/Hermione?
Here's another thought – for readers to wonder about this is not necessarily bad. To illustrate, I remember describing a character in my book, the Queen, to an agent at a pitch session and the agent said, "You know, I don't really like the Queen." I was upset, because the Queen had good reasons for all that she did, at least in her own eyes. I had worked hard to give her all those reasons, but early in the book I couldn't necessarily reveal all of them. It wasn't until much later after the interview that I realized it was *okay* for a reader to notlike a character I created. That gives me conflict I can work with!
Michelle Dyck says:
@ Hannah: Good question. I have a boy and a girl as my two main characters in the series I'm working on (which currently consists of three books), and I imagine that my readers will probably speculate about a romance between them. I don't think they'll ever fall in love – at least, not during the timeframe of the series – but to the readers it may look possible.
Anyway, my point is that by the time readers get a ways into a book and see no hint of romance, that idea may drop to the back of their minds and they'll focus on more pertinent story questions. I guess that's not really a solution to your brother's problem, but it may be a small comfort.
Hannah says:
Thank you both for sharing your advice with us. I'm glad I posted this in the right place.
Gail,
That might just do it, to have them seem unappealing to each other. That's a good suggestion. But then again sometimes when two characters absolutely hate each other that changes later on to love between them. Not in our case though, of course.
Michelle,
You're right, no matter what, readers will always assume that right from the start, but after some time they will no doubt 'drop the idea' that was encouraging to hear.
Michelle Dyck says:
Glad I could help. 🙂
LindseyZ says:
Hannah, your question reminded me of the Harry Potter series. In the first couple of books I somewhat expected (and hoped) Harry and Hermione would eventually fall in love. But as it turned out, they both ended up in different relationships (which I was just fine with). So one way to fix the problem is, though readers may expect one thing at first, soon follow with a begnining to a different relationship. Of course, that would only work if you were going to have at least some degree of romance in your books. ( :
Heather Jolliff says:
I'm on the other side of this – I'm writing about a boy and a girl, and my little sister asked if they were going to fall in love. 😀
My situation is a little different, though, as I am vaguely thinking about having them get together some time in the future, but not for a while as they're both 12!
writeforfun says:
Hyperbole is the greatest thing in the whole wide world!!! Just kidding(that was a hyperbole, get it? Sorry, I couldn't resist. I saw that on a T-shirt once). Anyway, I really do like hyperbole. I've often wondered if I use it too much, so this post was, as always, very helpful. Actually, there are two of my characters that I almost completely described in hyperbole. I had to tone one of them down slightly, because I over-did it, but the other one I left because it was a perfectly effective way to describe him.
writergirlforever says:
I have a question about characterization. I can make the beginning and introduce everyone, I can plan all the important plot points, and I can write the ending. My problem is the middle. I want my character to change, but they can't suddenly have a total character change overnight. I want my characters to be realistic and grow as people, how do I show that? I appreciate the time anyone took to read or answer this. Thank you.
Hannah says:
I'm not sure what kind of 'change' you would be hoping to develop. But let's say as an example you were writing about a princess; she was a complete snob, didn't care about anybody, and was extremely selfish. Through the book she might see how terrible the people in her kingdom were being treated, and her heart might begin to change. She might be forced to live as a common person, live in hiding. That too would change her. But those are dramatic events. I think you might introduce the change also by noting that the characters feelings and thoughts about matters change throughout the book. I guess that's not really that helpful though.
Michelle Dyck says:
I like what Hannah said. One thing you could do if you didn't want to be too dramatic is make the changes slowly and only a little bit at a time.
Take, for instance, Hannah's example of the snobbish princess. Maybe she's walking the kingdom's streets and sees a rich merchant demanding a ridiculously high price from an old peasant woman. The princess could be somewhat surprised at the cruelty. You could use her thoughts to show a twinge of compassion, quickly overridden by her selfishness.
Then later on in the story, let's say the princess encounters a similar situation. This time, she could do a little something to help. (If it was the above situation, perhaps she might slip the peasant a few coins afterward.) And as the story progresses and the princess softens even further, she may go so far as to step in in the next situation. She has the power to punish the merchant for his cruelty and also to financially help the peasant.
Anyway, the point is, if you make the changes slowly, and even have your character backslide midway through the positive changes, it may help make it all more believable.
Hope this helps, and sorry for the long comment! 🙂
writergirlforever says:
Thank you so much Hannah and Michelle! I'll try that.
Michelle Dyck says:
I'm glad I could be of some help. 🙂
How's your characterization going now?
Hannah says:
writeforfun,
I subscribed to this, so I got emails of the two comments you posted but now I only see one here… I'm not sure why. Anyway, in your other comment you said:
"the writer actually said, "He didn't really LOVE her, but he loved being with her,"…. I also can think of another book that described a girl as being a boy's "Best friend and a sister all rolled up in one." Comparing her to a sister immediately kept me from thinking 'love interest.'"
My brother and I REALLY like your suggestion, because as has been said, making them both have other romantic interests doesn't work when they're too young for that. To admire someone as though they're your sister or brother is a grand idea!! Thank you for sharing that with us.
______________________________________________
Heather Jolliff,
I'm not sure whether you're going to have them grow up further on in the book (or series) or they are going to remain 12 years old? But, your question reminded me of two things. First, the movie 'Flipped' have you seen it? It's about two 12 or 13 year olds who have a very good friendship. It's a good movie, I haven't seen it in a long time. But, I think it's a great example for the way to create love at a young age. Also, in the 'Emily Windsnap' series by Liz Kessler, she showed us that the lead character (Emily) might be more than just friends with Arron when they were sitting on a couch and they're hands touched, they both felt happy, like it was something special. I think it's simple things like that, that might get your point across. I'm not that experienced of a writer though, so what I say might not be that helpful to you.
writeforfun says:
I'm glad it helped!
E.S. Ivy says:
@ Leslie – I think the tree as big as a mountain that holds up the world was a great description!
@ Ms. Levine – I found the description of students in the US compared to Japan as really interesting, mainly as a parent. There is always something we can learn from other cultures. I've been wondering a lot lately how we can supplement the methods our kids are learning at school to give them new perspectives on things. But on the other hand, as a parent frustrated with testing, testing, and more testing, I think as Americans we sometimes bash our education system too much. I like how that study was balanced in its assessment. I just heard a report that one of our biggest "exports" is education through the number of foreign students coming to the US to attend college and graduate school.
Kathryn Briggs says:
HI! I just finished my Nanowrimo Novel, and now I don't know what to do. When you first get and idea, what EXACTLY do you do?
gailcarsonlevine says:
I write notes about where the story might go and who the characters might be, and I hold the idea in my mind. If I'm walking the dog, cooking, taking a shower,the idea is with me. Eventually a beginning arrives, and I'm off.
Kathryn Briggs says:
P.S. I think hyperboles can also be called metaphors
Alandra says:
I am sorry but you are not right because with a metaphor they are different than a hyperbole